The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I just forgot I was standing up.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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