At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
