i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
