i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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