We won't sleep together?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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