That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
