So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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