Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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