My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
