Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
