My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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