Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
