hotel room ftw
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
