Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
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