Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Randomize