My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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