if you like me you must not know who I am
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Randomize
