cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
