How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
