if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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