I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
