the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
