She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
