There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
