the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Randomize
