porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
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