Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
