Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
