Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
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