i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
