so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
