hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
