Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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