rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
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