I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
My penis needs a shock collar
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
