and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Floor bacon is actually really good
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
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