I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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