Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Randomize