So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
