I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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