Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
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