Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
