My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
