he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
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