I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Randomize
