I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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