In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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