he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
