Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
