Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
